in the raw

jhnmyr:

My whole life I’ve hated going to bed. I like falling asleep instead. Falling asleep is so much better than going to bed because you don’t get tangled up in the logistics. Falling asleep happens for you, even if it means waking up at eight to the sun assaulting your eyes while a block of metal videos are playing on VH1 Classic. Then all you have to do is scamper over to your bed where you can capitalize on how fresh the memory of how to sleep is and instantly dip back into slumber. Going to bed invites performance anxiety. Going to bed means you have to confront a final moment of consciousness. I’m not a fan. I hope you all fall asleep well tonight.

Yep. Yes. To all of this. Giving in to sleep when it starts to pull at you in a warm bed with my rope lights on and a fan going is one thing. Getting ready for it, knowing what awaits you in the morning, knowing you’re going to be useless for the next how many ever hours, that sucks. That’s why I disliked sleep when I was young as well. Sleep itself isn’t something to be feared, but the fact that it was needed, that sucked. Still does. I still wish I could like, sleep for a straight year, and then be awake for three.